Last weekend Kamaliah and I celebrated our first wedding anniversary. We spent time on a private island north of Pulau Kapas in Terangganu. The trip was much more of a honeymoon than the one we had last year in Cambodia, which we end up seeing patients at their houses instead. People say the first year of marriage is the hardest, I guess because as in any process of learning, the beginning is the toughest part. It was even tougher because 2016 was a year of drastic change for me. Several months after we got married, Kamaliah found out that she was pregnant. Not long after, Hospitals Beyond Boundaries shot to international prominence. She was there in New York when it all happened. Kamaliah had to bear the brunt of me shifting attention from her to the public which constantly barrage me with questions, interview requests and speaking engagements.
Upon returning to Malaysia, we received the distressing news that our baby's heart was no longer beating. It was such a hard thing to accept. At that same time, I was so occupied with prior speaking engagements and interviews, something that I regretted. I remembered the day she miscarried, I came back at night from a talk, and saw her crying on the bed. I was lost for words, and we only spent the night in silence, hugging each other till morning.
Upon returning to Malaysia, we received the distressing news that our baby's heart was no longer beating. It was such a hard thing to accept. At that same time, I was so occupied with prior speaking engagements and interviews, something that I regretted. I remembered the day she miscarried, I came back at night from a talk, and saw her crying on the bed. I was lost for words, and we only spent the night in silence, hugging each other till morning.
I still regret that I didn't spend my time at her side during the moment that she needed me most. But Kamaliah still stood by my side, and was always my number one supporter. She was always there to cheer me up with her wide smile. From the first day I met her, I've always had it in my mind that she is a person with an infectious smile. People just couldn't help smiling when they see her smile. She brings cheer to every room she enters, and I am blessed to have her exuding cheerfulness into every seconds of my life.
One year spending time with her, I realized that unconsciously, my life priority has slowly changed. If I can summarize everything she has taught me the past one year to one word, it would be: "humility". Being the super ambitious young man I used to be, it took a strong woman like her to change me. For the first time in my life, I find great satisfaction in fulfilling the need of someone other than myself. I begin to think as a couple, no longer as my own self. At a time that I thought I was "oh-so-human-look-at-me-I-am-humanitarian', she taught me what being a real human is all about. About sharing, caring about those who are close to us on top of caring for strangers, and knowing that no matter how amazing your life achievements are, it would be depressing if there is no one for you to share it with.
1 comment:
Thankyou for sharing this amazing experience with us. keep sharing.
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