Monday, July 21, 2014

Bringing Me Down

Once while I was working I witnessed the most insensitive way a doctor breaks bad news of having terminal cancer to a girl of my age. Funny thing is that I don't realize how wrong it was until I had my off-day some days later to ponder upon what had happened. The patient was my age, and the way she was told that she was going to die was so detached of humanity. The frustrating thing is that it was too common, that none of my colleagues commented on it, like it was the most normal thing to do. I don't fully blame the doctor or my friends, because it is too typical here. Maybe because terminal cancer is too common, but then again how did people do it in other places? I might not even thought of this if I haven't been around traveling

I am afraid of what our culture has become, but I am more afraid that being surrounded with this culture every single day, from 5 a.m. to 7 p.m, my brain is slowly accepting it. I've already started showing signs and symptoms. Why did it take a few days, and a day-off for me to realize how wrong it was? I would have straight away tell my colleagues "Isn't that wrong?". But being too busy with hospital work, everyone kept silent. I read again what I wrote while I was working for the WHO: "We Actually Get Stupider When We Work Too Much: The Case of House Officers", and I could imagine myself a few months ago being disappointed with my future self for succumbing into a life too busy, it sucks the life and humanity out of me.

Oh Allah, please save me from this, let me save lives without turning into one selfish, insensitive bastard

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Be strong to be yourself Dr! Be with the one you love often. :)

May Allah protects you!

Anonymous said...

all you can be is different from those insensitive doctors... stay healthy, may Allah protect you. :)

Anonymous said...

Salam...actually,itulah yg biasa trjadi dlm dunia pkerjaan...apa sahaja pkerjaan skalipun,cbarannya pasti ada..brbeza dr waktu blajar. Tekanannya, environmentnya...cuma,carilah 1 prkara dlm diri kita yg kita nk pegang utk panduan hidup kita. Kita boleh brubah ikut enviroment pekerjaan kita tapi peganglh 1 prkara dlm diri kita yg kita tahu betul & tak kan ubah wpun apa yg akan datang berbeza dari itu...1st year bkerja mmg dugaan yg besar tp prcayalah masuk tahun ke 2 & sterusnya,InsyaAllah smua akan brtambah baik...tip paling penting, brlapang dada..hasbunallahhuwani'malwakeel..:)

'Aini said...

Assalamualaikum,
A group of medical students joined one of our hospital visit session. Antara maklum balas yang kami terima, pelajar-pelajar tersebut melihat wad dan pesakit dari perspektif yg berbeza daripada kunjungan rutin sebagai doktor. As a doctor all they care is medical history and symptoms they need to treat. That's the main connection. Tapi bila ziarah bersama NGO dgn objektif berbeza, they see stuff they have missed before this.

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